


Mystery Date

by Rebcake



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Chocolate, F/M, Season/Series 04, Vampires, Werewolves
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-31
Updated: 2010-10-31
Packaged: 2017-10-18 15:52:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/190530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rebcake/pseuds/Rebcake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wherein Buffy and Willow discuss their man troubles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mystery Date

**Author's Note:**

> Set post- _Something Blue_ but before Willow gets heavy with Tara. A Season 4 Chocolate Therapy interlude.

“I know it’s the Hellmouth, but we’re 0-for-3 here!” said Buffy. “Our track record with apocalypses is hotter than with guys. Unless we’re talking about running them out of town. Then we’re undefeated with one forfeit — Parker.”

“Poophead,” corrected Willow with a frown. “None of them turned out to be very dependable. You’d think at least man’s best friend would stick around.”

Buffy dug out a large scoop of Triple Chocolate Climax and handed the tub back to Willow. She halted the spoon halfway to her mouth as she had a thought. She lifted a finger toward the ceiling while she worked it out.

“Maybe monsters just aren’t the greatest boyfriend material. I mean, vampires get all the good press: romantic, mysterious, devoted to the point of obsession, pretty forever. In reality though, no mirrors when you want to freshen up.” She poked another thought and decided that Willow knew everything anyway. “And all those rumors of sexytimes by the bucketload? In my experience, not so much.” She noticed her ice cream about to drip onto the carpet, and popped the spoon into her mouth just in time. Yay, slayer reflexes.

“Yep,” said Willow, nodding sadly. “At least that wasn’t a problem for me and Oz, until the very end. We always had a good time playing Hide The Bone.”

“Willow! How much of this stuff have you had?” Buffy grabbed the ice cream container and checked inside. “You’re cut off.”

“Don’t I know it,” said Willow with a sigh.

Buffy considered her dejected friend. “You miss it, don’t you? Not just him: _it_.”

“Well, him and _it_ are kind of mushed together for me, but: yeah.”

Maybe it was the chocolate, but Buffy felt ready for some frank talk.

“So, what do you miss most about the monster lovin’?”

Willow blushed bright red. “Um. Well, there was the sniffing. I mean, sometimes he’d just sort of breathe me in, and, and, then his eyelids would…flutter, and it seemed like just that was enough to, um, do it for him. Does that sound gross?”

Buffy thought about how Angel always seemed to be holding his breath around her. Not big with the confidence building. Then she remembered another vampire: _Fee fi fo fum, I smell the blood of a nice, ripe girl_ …and she felt a little squirmy.

“It’s sort of…nice to be appreciated, I guess.”

“And there was also a sort of nibbling thing he did. Not exactly biting, but just a bitty hint that maybe he wanted to eat me all up.” Willow hurried to clarify. “Not in the hurty, slavering jaws way; just — consuming, edge of control stuff.”

“Yeah, for me, the bitey was all about the hurty. Consuming: not a Buffy go-to fantasy. The reality bites version kinda killed that one.”

Though…the memory of Spike tasting her earlobe, then gently nipping her finger while they wrote out their guest list, sent a shiver racing across her skin. She pushed the ice cream away.

Willow jumped as another thought struck her. “Oh! Sometimes Oz would growl a little, and it made me go all “Yes sir! Whatever you say, sir!’ Not out loud or anything. I know it’s not very grrrl power, but it was still pretty grrrr.” She let her head fall back onto her bed and groaned. “This isn’t helping.”

Buffy had to agree. Angel might have been the strong, silent type, but during Willow’s spell she’d heard plenty. She could practically feel the rumbly voice, pitched just for her; the vibrations coming from his chest when she leaned into him; the low, dirty chuckle: it did sort of make a girl want to present her soft underbelly. Which was ten kinds of wrong. And would never happen. Not while she was the Slayer and Spike was an evil-doer. So: never, ever, ever. But…

She and Willow sighed again.

“Okay, there might be some perks,” conceded Buffy. “But nice, normal, regular, human guys probably have their advantages, too. All we have to do is open the door, right?”

“I dunno, Buffy. Maybe once you go beast, you can never go back…”

They looked at each other and reached for more chocolate.

 _FIN_

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the "Werewolves vs. Vampires" challenge at the LiveJournal community sb_fag_ends.


End file.
